A Light at the End of the Tunnel

For as long as I can remember, I've wanted to get married and have several children. All my dreams as a child were to grow up and be a mom and have a family. That dream has been so incredibly distant these 7 years of marriage. I thought by now I would have a few little ones running around keeping me busy. Yet there is no pitter patter of feet running thru the hallways, or the laughter of children heard within these walls. It is a quiet place. A place where I often despair if I will ever see my dreams of motherhood come true. I sometimes shut myself off from the world - it is too painful to see other women playing with their children, holding their precious baby, giving tons of hugs and kisses. Will I ever have my turn?

I will have my turn! There is light at the end of the tunnel. My arms will not be empty for long! No, I am not pregnant. We are ADOPTING! Joe and I had always said we would adopt instead of doing fertility treatments if we were not able to get pregnant. Once it was time to make that decision, tho, it was really hard. A part of me felt that I was giving up on me, that I should try just a little bit longer to get pregnant. A part of me was scared, there is so much to consider in adoption! And a part of me finally had hope... hope that I would actually get to be a mom. That I could actually hold my own sweet baby in my arms. That I could soon hear that pitter patter of little feet and the walls would ring with laughter! Hope! Such a wonderful thing.

So here we are, we have applied to the Adoption and Beyond Agency and have filled out all the Home Study paperwork and turned it in! Now we await approval and then we will enter the agency's program and be waiting for a baby! Such an exciting time in our life! God has a baby out there for us. It may not be the way we planned, but it is HIS plan and it will be perfect!